The other day my car had a flat tire. I called AAA and an agent said someone would be sent immediately, however, thanks to my bad luck, they sent a rescue squid.

To begin with, it took him 19 hours to squirm from the bottom of the Atlantic and cross two interstates to get to my Buick Century.

When he did finally arrive he was unable to properly handle the lug nuts or remove the hubcap, instead he simply traced the outline of the tire with one of his tentacles, stared at it for 30 minutes and then splattered it with ink.

As he slithered away he tossed a receipt for a bucket of krill! I could not believe it, what a rip off!