Chapter Seven: Amanda

Wednesday June 22, 1910

On Wednesday morning, Sarah was at home repairing a hole in the chicken coop. It was not her favorite job, she quietly hoped for some relief from the tedious task.

"Sarah?"

Her head popped up.

"Sarah? Are you back there?"

"Pete?" She could see Pete walking towards her with his horse.

"Yeah, I'm back here at the chicken coop. How are you this morning?"

He said with reluctant shrug. "Fine. Fine, I… I guess."

"What's wrong?"

Pete tied his horse to a tree and wiped the sweat off of his brow.

"I have a mystery on my hands, Sarah."

"I'm listening."

"Besides the hardware store, my uncle Lloyd runs a moving business. This is a small town so, as you can imagine, we don't get much business. Yesterday afternoon, we received a telegram. It was a pick up and delivery of some furniture and luggage that was coming on the moonlight express, that's the train that comes in real late, once a week. The lumber mill mostly uses it. Freight, no passengers."

"Yeah, I know about that train. It always frightens Sarafina."

Pete continued, "Last night, as my uncle and I were unloading one of the freight cars, we noticed… two passengers."

Sarah scrunched her eyebrows. "But, you just said the train only carries freight."

"I know, but for some reason, this time a woman and a… a person with her were riding in the freight car carrying their furniture. My guess is they'd taken a train into River City and, for whatever reason they wanted to arrive in Eagle Creek at night so they just climbed aboard with their belongings. It's a short trip; the conductor didn't say anything about it."

"Go on."

"The woman was Beverly Taylor."

Sarah tilted her head.

"Beverly Taylor? Amanda Taylor's mother?"

Pete solemnly nodded.

Sarah smiled. "Amanda's back? That's wonderful! I haven't seen her in three years and…."

Pete kept his head down. He was despondent.

Sarah whispered, "Pete? What's wrong?"

Pete tipped his head up. "Amanda… was wearing a large, canvass mask."

Sarah shook her head. "I don't understand."

"We started removing their belongings. My uncle Lloyd talked a bit with Mrs. Taylor and received some money for our services. Amanda just stood there against the wall. I asked, 'Amanda? Is that you?'

She didn't say anything in reply. I wasn't sure what to do so I just went back to my job.

I thought that maybe it wasn't her but then Beverly Taylor walked into the freight car and took her hand. She said, 'Come along… Amanda.'

We put all their belongings on the dock, loaded the first wagon and then the second. Mrs. Taylor and Amanda rode with my uncle. As soon as we arrived at their house, he helped them down. Mrs. Taylor took a key out of an envelope and opened the door. She checked to make sure the house had electricity and running water.

I went in carrying a big box and I saw Amanda again. She was just leaning up against the wall of the parlor.

I said, 'It's Pete Jackson.'

She mumbled, 'I recognized your voice.'

'Sarah and Emily will be glad to see that you're back.'

'Shut up,' she said.

'Don't you want to see them again?"

She yelled, 'Shut up, Pete Jackson! I don't want to see anyone else in this stupid town. I hate everyone here!'

She kept swinging her arms hoping that she might hit me.

Her mother rushed in and told her to calm down. They held each other. I heard Amanda wail like she was crying.

My uncle Lloyd grabbed me by the arm and said, 'Don't say anything more to them. Let's just get this move over with and go home.'

'Yes, sir.' I said. We made two more trips and got back home around 3 this morning."

Sarah rubbed her chin. "Do you know why she'd be so hateful?"

"No. She just kept to herself. She had no interest in speaking to me or anyone else for that matter."

Sarah slowly shook her head. "None of this makes sense."

Pete shrugged. "I just thought you should know."

He untied his horse and climbed back on.

"The house is at 412 Cedar Street."

Sarah gave him a polite smile. "Thank you, Pete."

He yawned. "Excuse me. I've got the rest of the day off. I'm heading back home. Good luck, Sarah."

As Pete's horse slowly trotted away, Sarah considered her options. She desperately wished that Emily wasn't so far away in Helena. But, at the same time, she knew that she had to listen to her gut and do what she felt was right. She got on her bicycle and rode across town to Cedar Street.

When she arrived, she leaned her bike against a fence. The light gray, two story house had a big sign out front. "Taylor's Salon for Women."

It was the same business her mother had operated before the family had moved three years earlier. Most of her customers were still in town though frustrated that the nearest ladies' salon was an hour away in River City.

It was a hot day. The door was wide open. Sarah carefully stepped on the front porch.

"Mrs. Taylor? Amanda? Is anyone home?"

Mrs. Taylor came from the kitchen, maneuvering around boxes.

"Sarah Conrad?"

Sarah smiled. "Yes, ma'am. I'm glad you're back in…."

"We're not open yet. Please come back another day."

"Mrs. Taylor I'm here on a social call."

"I don't want visitors. Please leave us in peace."

"Can I talk to Amanda?"

"No. Now please dismiss yourself from my property."

Sarah's face fell. "I just wanted to say 'hello' and…."

"Shall I call the authorities?"

"No ma'am. I'm leaving."

Sarah gave a brief, polite nod and began to walk away. Suddenly, she spun around and yelled, "Amanda? Amanda?"

Mrs. Taylor was angry. "I told you to leave!"

"Mom? Mom? Is that Sarah Conrad?"

Sarah stepped up to confront Mrs. Taylor. "Yes, Amanda, it's me, Sarah."

"Can you come on back and visit with me?"

Mrs. Taylor closed her eyes and shook her head, no.

Sarah said, "Ma'am, with all due respect, Amanda is nineteen-years-old. She has a right to choose for herself."

Mrs. Taylor blocked with her right arm. "This is your final warning. Leave Sarah and don't come back."

"Mom? Please let Sarah visit with me."

Mrs. Taylor relented. "Well, don't say I didn't warn you."

Sarah nodded and walked down a hall.

"I'm in the master bedroom, straight back."

Sarah slowly pushed open a door. The room was illuminated from sunlight via an open window.

"Amanda?"

Amanda was seated on a chair in the far corner of the room. She was wearing a simple dress and her mask.

"Have a seat on the bed. Don't come anywhere near me. Ok?"

Sarah mumbled, "Ok." She sat down on the bed.

"You didn't write to me. On June 11, 1907, the last day I was in Eagle Creek, I asked you and Emily and David to keep in touch. Each of you wrote once, only once and then there was nothing. I didn't receive Christmas cards; you people treated me like I'd dropped off the face of the earth."

Sarah swallowed. "Um… sorry. Look, Amanda, Em and I were thirteen, just kids. I meant to write you, honest but… I don't know, we just… didn't. And, as I recall, I received one letter and one Christmas card from you."

Amanda snapped. "I had a reason to keep silent."

Sarah did not know how to respond.

"Sarah? I'm sorry. I don't mean to be so gruff. These last three years have been a nightmare for me. Everyday there is bitterness mingled with pain and it only grows."

"I was unaware."

Amanda sighed. "Did David Clementine join the army?"

Sarah smiled. "He did. It was a big dream for him."

"That's all he ever talked about. David and I were dating when my dad up and moved mom and I to Sioux Falls. If I'd stayed, David would've married me. I would be…." Her voice broke. "I'd be a wife and mother."

Sarah stood up. She wanted to go and comfort her friend.

Amanda barked, "Sit back down!"

Sarah returned to the bed and sat down.

"Did Diane Grossman go to Jennings?"

"Yes. She's majoring in film. Last March, when she came home for break, she had a movie camera and made a short film. It starred Emily and I. We haven't seen it because it wasn't ready and, and there's no projector in town. When Em and I went to Jennings a few weeks ago we looked her up but Diane had gone with some friends to Yellowstone. I would really like to see the film. It's called 'A Tale of Two Women.'"

"I wish I could see it too. Get it? That's a joke. I'm blind now."

"Yeah," Sarah said carefully. "I get it."

"Is Emily still flirting with every boy in town?"

Sarah chuckled, "Your young apprentice is faring well."

"That's good."

"Are you going to be helping out your mother with the salon?"

Amanda spoke with indignation, "Excuse me?"

Sarah stammered, "I… I was just wondering if…?"

"No!" she screamed. "I'll be sitting in this dark room the rest of my life! That's what I'll be doing you blithering idiot!"

Sarah tried to keep from crying. "I'm sorry, Amanda. I just…."

"Let's talk about you. Are you still pining for the preacher's son? What's his name? Kevin?"

Sarah wiped a tear from her eye. "Kevin's dead."

"Dead?"

"He was killed in an accident at Fort Louis, that's an Army base."

Amanda whispered, "My Goodness, oh Sarah, I'm so sorry. Wait, wait a minute, I'm not sorry; I'm jealous!"

Sarah was shocked. "What?"

"I wish I were dead. I've wanted to kill myself for three years and I haven't mustered the courage to do it! My mother gives me one pain pill a day so I can't commit suicide in that fashion. We don't own a gun. I have no way of dying and I want to die!"

Sarah was confused. "Why?"

"Why not? I hate my life. I hate everything! I hate you! I hate that doughy tramp you call your best friend. I hate the man who was supposed to be my husband. I hate my mother. I hate my… my…" she calmed down. "I don't hate my daddy. I miss him. I miss him more than…." She began wailing.

Sarah went over and tried to hold Amanda's hand.

"Sit down!" she screamed.

Sarah sat back down.

Amanda's mother came to the door. She gave a dire look to Sarah.

"Amanda, sweetheart, do you want Sarah to leave?"

"No mother; all is well. I just got a little worked up."

"Fine." Mrs. Taylor slowly closed the door.

Amanda shook her head. "I hate that woman. Why won't she let me die? Everything that I had in my life that was beautiful is gone."

Sarah did not know how to respond.

Amanda continued, "The night before my family left for South Dakota, I went to see David at the bakery." Amanda voice lowered. She spoke wistfully, "We were going to run away together. But then…" her voice broke. "Emily did something stupid and came home early. I never even got the chance to say 'Good-bye' to the man I loved. And now… and now I'll never feel a man's touch ever again."

Amanda was shaking. She was trying to weep, but she seemed unable to do so. She took a moment to compose herself.

"I don't want to talk anymore about my misery, Sarah, let's talk about yours. Are you dating anyone?"

"No. I met a boy in Helena when Emily and I went there for a rhetoric tournament at Jennings University a few weeks ago. His name is Simon. I fell madly in love but, Simon and I are just too different. He's so far away… and he's older. I guess we're just on two different paths."

"What about Emily?"

"She had better luck with love. As a matter of fact, she's is in Helena right now. Her dad had a business trip and allowed her to tag along. She's staying at her friend Jan's house. She met a boy named Jeff. They're still together."

"How are your brothers?"

"Martin married a couple of years ago. He and his wife Gladys adopted twin boys a few months ago. Robert's wife had a little girl in May."

"You know Sarah; I always wished you were my sister. I would've liked that very much."

"You were like a big sister to Emily and I."

Amanda chuckled, "I guess I was at that."

"How are your sisters?"

Amanda stretched. "They are… bothersome." Amanda shook her head. "The whole world's been turned upside down. I'm their big sister. Lori is 12. Julia is 10. I'm 18 and they have to help me! I'm a baby all over again. I have these stupid restrictions concerning my food."

"How so?"

Amanda unbuttoned her left sleeve and rolled it up.

She spoke in a childish voice, "My mommy doesn't let me eat cut my food any more." She showed Sarah a long, scar down the middle of her wrist. "It seems that I'm a little clumsy… with knives."

Sarah's tone grew weary, "Amanda?"

"And then there's those darned kerosene lanterns. If you throw one up against the wall the fire department gets really upset and then the poor little freak goes to jail for a few weeks."

"Is there anything I can do for you?"

Her voice lightened: "Can you bring me a loaded pistol?"

Sarah stammered, "No."

"Then you're off the hook. I'd say we've done enough reminiscing: get lost!"

Sarah pleaded with her. "Amanda? Amanda?"

"Leave my house!"

"No! No! You're my friend. You're in pain. I won't leave you alone to stew in misery!"

"I hate you Sarah Conrad!"

"I love you Amanda Taylor!"

"Amanda Taylor is dead! She died on August 19th, 1907. I'm a demon! See!" Amanda reached up to the top of her head and pulled off the mask.

Sarah screamed in terror.

There was a deep, fleshy chasm where her eyes and nose should be.

Sarah turned away. "Oh Amanda! Oh Amanda!"

"I'm a demon Sarah! I'm a demon! Now leave my pit of doom."

Sarah shook her head. "No. I want to stay."

Amanda leapt from her chair. "Then gimme a kiss!"

Sarah tried to push her away.

"No! No! Stop it!"

"Kiss the demon, Sarah, kiss the demon!"

Sarah strained to push her away. She stumbled and flopped against the door.

The door opened. Amanda's mother struggled to keep Amanda off of Sarah. "Amanda Bernice Taylor you stop this nonsense right now!"

Sarah got away from her.

She slammed the door shut and then turned her attention to Sarah. "I specifically told you to leave several times. I didn't want you bothering us. Now that you know the truth just keep it to yourself and never come back here again. Do you understand me?"

Sarah wiped her face.

"Yes, ma'am. I'll go."

Sarah ran down the hall and out the door.

As soon as she'd passed the gate, she sat down on the curb and wept. "Oh Lord, Lord help her please."

After a few minutes, she calmed down and rode away. When she arrived at Lynn's house a few minutes later, Lynn and Jake were in the front yard playing croquet.

Lynn looked up. "Sarah? Sarah what's wrong?"

"Oh Lynn," she awkwardly got off the bike and ran over to Lynn with her arms open. They held on to each other.

Jake quietly slipped back in to the house.

Lynn and Sarah talked for quite a long time on the front porch.

Eventually, Jake returned and sat down beside Sarah.

Lynn cleared her throat. "We're having a private conversation."

Jake ignored her. "I've been listening-in on your conversation."

Lynn snapped, "Jake that's very…."

He interrupted her and spoke in a monotone, nagging voice he'd heard on innumerable occasions, "Jake that's very rude. I shouldn't spy on people. I know the routine Cousin Lynn, now let me talk."

Sarah giggled at the exchange, impressed by his boldness. "I want to hear what you have to say Jake."

"Thank you Sarah. Up until recently, I've always had a hard time making friends. I've relied on my art to make me happy by giving me… purpose. If I were to lose that… it would mean the end of world for me.

Now then, Amanda is a girl and I know that they place a lot of value in romance: it means everything. When she lost her sight, it was more than the cessation of one of her senses; it was the end of her. I like to draw but if I lost my eyesight," he shrugged. "I dunno, I could sculpt with clay or work with wood because I have an artistic mindset. Amanda defined her self by her ability to attract men and share her beauty with everyone. Some one took that away from her and now she has nothing. In a way, she's right: Amanda is dead." He leaned in and spoke softly, "But Sarah, you can bring her back to life!"

Sarah tilted her head. "What? How?"

"I don't know how I only know why: because that's what you were meant to do."

Sarah hung her head down.

Jake placed an arm around her shoulders and whispered, "Sarah you and I are very different. I've known you for three days; you're three years older than me but I'm already firmly convinced of two important facts.

Number One: Our journey together has just begun.

And, Number Two: You can and will do anything to bind the wounds of your friends."

She gently brushed his cheek. "Oh Jake."

"Now get to work."

"I will, Jake. I will."

Jake stood up and went back to his room.

Lynn made googly eyes and shook her head. "That was weird."

Sarah replied softly, "That was everything."